I hope I haven’t put off all of the potential readers of this post who are men … because of the picture I chose. Believe me … this post applies to you too. And I bet a lot of women would agree with me.

So, here’s what happened.

I have been going to the same hairdresser for several years now. And most of the time, it seems like we communicate pretty well.

I’m not one of those people who makes dramatic hair color changes but I do have to cover up those greys.

So, over the last several appointments, I have been telling my hairdresser that I thought my hair was looking “brassy” … which to me meant that it didn’t have a lot of depth of color. You know, ladies, it looked faded. I thought maybe it was from too much sun exposure. But then it seemed like it was getting worse with every visit.

So, last time I went to the salon to cover up those roots and brighten my look, my hairdresser spun me around in the chair to look in the mirror at the end of my appointment and I was really disappointed. My hair color was definitely not what I wanted it to be.

So, I said something about it looking really “too brassy” and my hairdresser seemed really puzzled by my comment.

And then she really did a really smart thing. She asked me “What does that mean to you?” I told her that it looked washed out and she immediately knew what I meant. “Oh,” she replied, “you don’t want it to be more ash?” to which I replied “No, I don’t like ash tones for my hair at all!”

Miscommunication solved. The word “brassy” meant different things to each of us. And it doesn’t matter whose definition was right or wrong. What was really important is that it was completely different and the gap was getting bigger.

I’m grateful that my hairdresser asked me the magical question and got me to describe what I was trying to say … because if I had continued to use the same word … we would have gotten nowhere fast.

Jeanette