Having elementary-school-aged children is a very precarious time for a marriage--or so I learned during graduate school. I remember having an infant at the time and wondering--will my husband and I break-up when they hit school-age?

Not sure if the book I read gave an in-depth reason for this trend, but it may have something to do with the rigors of child-rearing...or maybe the Seven-Year-Itch that many couples encounter, which happens to coincide with this time in many couples'…

Have you ever felt like you have been dragged into a dispute??

I don't know about you, but I have.

Before you can blink, your muscles are starting to tense and your heart beats faster. Your lizard brain is starting to engage and the little hairs on the back of your neck are starting to bristle. You're in ... and ready to 'get it on.'

Did you ever think that you…

It's been a pretty stressful week in our home. My husband, who started a new job about a year ago, is under a tremendous amount of pressure at work--trying to please his boss. Now, my husband would be classified as a people-pleaser and very, very easy to please. I'm being serious when I tell you that all he asked for when he turned 48 this past January was a bag of pretzels and some Cokes (and that's what he got).…

I don't know about you ... when I hear the word DEFENSE, I think of a football fan holding up a big letter "D" and a fence and shouting the word so loudly that it resonates above everyone else doing the same thing.

Little did I realize that I could also be thinking about that word in the context of every day conflict.

I had my observer hat on this past week during a…

After reading Jeanette's blog Monday about more mediators in public office, it got me thinking about where else mediators may be helpful--and schools came to mind.

Of course, school psychologists can be extremely helpful in resolving conflict between students, between students and teachers, and between faculty. But, they're often busy helping students with emotional struggles and family dynamics. If mediators or conflict resolution specialists were placed in schools, I can only…

Are you frustrated with the polarization that characterizes our political environment? Do you think that elected officials should set aside their partisan approach and work together to address our nation's challenges?

If that's the case, you will like the work of The "Elect Mediators to Public Office" Project.…

I just read an interesting article in Mediate.com that spoke the issue of blame--and who's fault it is when a marriage or relationship fails.

Although "blame" is not hardly new territory to tackle, the article made me realize that it's human nature to want to assign blame to a conflict. So, as mediators, we're in the business of going AGAINST human nature to some degree--and asking the parties to do that, as well.…

The definition of a "dance" in Websters dictionary is "a series of movements that match the speed and rhythm of a piece of music." Now, why on earth would I write out that in a conflict resolution blog?

The reason is that in mediation, I often see conflicting parties "dance" with one another. What do I mean by that?

They have their own music that defines their…

I'm a cradle Catholic, so I do know the "rules" when it comes to getting a divorce in the eyes of the Catholic Church--basically, you must get the marriage "annulled" by a Priest, or you cannot remarry in the Catholic Church.

I had no idea, however, how other religions viewed religious divorce--until I came upon an article in Mediate.com which discussed a divorce in the Jewish religion. It's called a "get," and many Orthodox Jews are refusing to give them to their wives (in the…

Often ... a real life experience inspires me to write a specific post.

The idea for this blog was born when I was at a meeting with other mediators and I thought ... wow, we might need a mediator.

We had such differing opinions about a project we were working on. I observed my colleagues get pretty passionate about their perspectives and positions. I…

I think we can all agree...asking for forgiveness is pretty hard. In fact, I've only recently learned how to do it (I'm pushing 40, but the way).The other day, my 4 year-old son had a particularly exhausting tantrum over (of all things) a football jersey. I should probably let you know that he will ONLY wear football jerseys, but it's always a struggle deciding which one to wear.

Well,…

Sometimes the future seems so far away ... especially when you have to make a decision today that will affect you for a long time to come.

Take, for example, coming up a parenting/custody plan with your 'soon to be ex-spouse' regarding your child who is only a toddler. It might seem overwhelming to put down on paper, a plan that's supposed to last 15 or 16 years!

But that's what parents can be faced with.

So here's a thought ... that could also apply to just about any…

Since my husband's job has kept us "on the move" over the past few years, our family has inhabited quite a few different homes. Some have been newer or bigger than others, but, suffice it to say, they've all been pretty nice.

But, that doesn't seem to matter to my kids. If you were a fly on the window in our car, you would swear we live in a cardboard box under the overpass! Every large home we pass comes with sighs of awe and someone shouting out "I call that one!" from the…

Teaching children conflict resolution skills is probably one of the most important contributions that we can make! So when I came across this idea ... I just had to share.

I would like to thank a teacher named Ms. Lou for blogging about this tool she uses in her classroom in Canada.

So here's how it works:

First, you need a bug and a wand. In her classroom, the bug is a bee.…

So, last week, I had a play date (a time for some grown-up conversation while the children are preoccupied with someone else's toys).

But, this play date was a little different. Whereas most of my social encounters are with people whom I've known, at least for a little bit, this one was different. This "Mom" and I passed each other every day while picking up our children from their half-day at school--but, we never conversed, other than to nod or say "Good Morning."…

It was with a heavy heart that I read about the passing of Assemblyman Bernie Anderson earlier this month. Most of his colleagues probably don't know this, or perhaps don't remember, but Mr. Anderson was instrumental in funding the Neighborhood Mediation Center (NMC) here in Washoe County.

In 1997, he sponsored a bill (AB 208), which modeled the successful Clark County Neighborhood Justice Center program and encouraged smaller counties to start justice centers of their own.

The…

I was just reading an interesting article about mediation, and it explored something that I think most mediators would agree is essential to being impartial and unbiased: The ability to acknowledge there may be more than one "truth."Every time I watch a 24 hour news channel, it seems one pundit or another is discussing his or her own opinion, and I carefully watch the anchor. Does he or she seem to agree with one side over the other? Does he or she give more air-time to one side?…